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I am just Me. Am I?

Saturday, May 08, 2004

Started to read all over again...

1st time this hols I felt like I was doing something fruitful. I picked up a book to read. And it's beeeen good so far! 5 people you meet in Heaven. Mitch Albom is a good writer. I must say that in spite of the fact that i'm barely 1/4 through the book! And I agree with this point the author made.

Funerals and a new-born bring people together. But I also wanna add something to the list. 21st birthdays! Bwahah...but it actually just boils down to Birth and Death. Sigh...there are like at least 3 funerals going on around my house...hmm...dun exactly know how to describe my feelings...but there's a sense of slight discomfort. I could never associate Death with anything Happy I guess...

I admit that I truly enjoyed bumming for the past 2 weeks. But the guilt starts to set in after a while...of endless spending and no income...plus it's exceptionally bad when the family is NOT well-to-do to begin with. Still...i'm not like exactly very enthusiastic in looking for a job. Sent out half completed resumes which I'm sure any respectable organisation will trash. What's wrong with me? It's been so long since I've done something "whole-heartedly"

Just like I forgot how it feels like to slog my heart out working, to go all out to diet by jogging everyday...from 4 rounds to 6 to 8 and then doing 10 rounds comfortably...I soon gave up all that and I never could pick up the same determination ever.

What's wrong? But well...at least I went for a jog with Cuiling today. walked 2 rounds, jogged 4 and did 8 push-ups...wat impressive figures! :( Sigh...

But i was So happy to meet up with Cui and talking and bearing my heart to an old friend. it wasn't much of a conversation...but somehow...i felt less burdened. I think that's what good friends are for. To share joys and woes. And to help each other realise that we're just normal people, with the same weaknesses and faults...and that it's just part of our human nature.

My morning was quite exciting though! Travelled from Bishan to Aljunied to Ubi to Jurong, Jurong East and then finally Clementi! Bwahaha...but I felt more comfortable with E and I decided that's how friendships are formed! Via communication! It's time I opened up more to people...I suddenly feel like i'm making a new friend here cos' while...being together in a car for about 4 hours driving around Singapore, making countless U-turns, looking out for road signs to find warehouses...But it was fun! Though we did have a bit of trouble collecting the magazines n E was late in returning the car...but things eventually turned out fine. As oppose to our first marketing trip when I was consciously trying to make conversation...today's was more spontaneous, more crappy and light-hearted!

After we unloaded all the goods I was all ready and happy that I could watch Fruits Basket in the room! BUT...i never expected E to return early and ask if I wanted lunch! Sigh...I wasn't really hungry but skipping a meal for a cartoon seemed pretty ridiculous so we met up with another comm. member to have Curry Chicken noodles at NUH! I can't believe I ate such a HUGE potato! But well...I even had Ching Teng after that!!!

Tmr's Mother's Day. Really wish to do something nice for my dearest Mummy...but cos' of the Dry Run that will be happening tmr...I dunno what kind of plans I can come up with...

Maybe I'm not that filial after all?


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